| TOP TEN REASONS WHY TRICK OR TREATING IS BETTER THAN SEX |
10) You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack. 9) If you get tired, you can wait 10 minutes and go at it again. 8) The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some. 7) You don't have to compliment the person who gives you some. 6) It's O.K. when the person you're with fantasizes you're someone else, because you are. 5) Forty years from now you'll still enjoy candy. 4)...
|
|
| 10 Husbands, Still a Virgin? |
A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin." "What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?" "Well, Husband 1 was a sales representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be. Husband 2 was in software services; he was never really sure...
|
|
| Sex Education |
A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw an unusually beautiful woman boarding the plane.He soon realized she was heading straight toward his seat. Lo and behold, she took the seat right beside his.Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out, "Business trip or vacation?"She turned, smiled, and said, "Business. The annual Sexual Education...
|
|
| The Priest |
Q: Why did the Priest go to Walmart?A: He wanted to get boys pants "half" off!
|
|
| Don't ask any questions |
A guy worked in an adult book store. One afternoon his friend walked in. The guy said, "Dude,thank goodness you showed up!" "I'm starving, and I need you to watch the counter for me for a few minutes, while I run across the street to get some lunch."The friend looked around the store, then looked back at his friend oddly. The guy said, "Dude, don't ask any questions, just sell it to em." The...
|
|
| Getting Down Under |
An American woman of 40 wants to get married, but she is only willing to marry a man who has never been with a woman sexually. After several unsuccessful years of searching, she decides to take out a personal ad. She ends up corresponding with a man who has lived his entire life in the Australian Outback, and after a long-distance courtship, they decide to get married. On their wedding night,...
|
|
| Two Nuns |
There were two nuns...One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM), and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL).It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.SL: It's logical. He wants to rape us.SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15...
|
|
| It's Dark In Here |
A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet.One day the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet, as well.Inside the closet, the little boy says, "It's dark in here, isn't it?""Yes it is," the man replies."You wanna buy a baseball?" the little boy asks."No thanks," the man replies."I think you do want...
|
|
| Marketing that Makes Sense |
Finally, a definition of Marketing that makes sense....You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, "I'm fantastic in bed." That's Direct Marketing.You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, "He's fantastic in bed." That's Advertising.You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get...
|
|
| Doggie Fashion |
It has been studied and determined that the most often usedSexual position for married couples is the doggie position.The husband sits up and begs...And the wife rolls over and plays dead.
|
|
|
Add To Favorites
Make LIG Your Home Page
Feedback?
