| football fan to rescue |
Two boys are playing football in Central Park when one is attacked by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips off a board of the nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dogs neck.A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy. "Young Giants Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he starts writing in his...
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| Jock vs. Nerd |
Is It Better To Be a Jock or a Nerd?$ Michael Jordan having "retired," with $40 million in endorsements, makes $178,100 a day, working or not.$ If he sleeps 7 hours a night, he makes $52,000 every night while visions of sugarplums dance in his head.$ If he goes to see a movie, it'll cost him $7.00, but he'll make $18,550 while he's there.$ If he decides to have a 5 minute egg, he'll make $618...
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| Gorilla Golf |
A guy walked into a pro-shop with a gorilla. "Is anyone interested in a little wager?" he said, flashing some large bills around. "I've got $500.00 here that says my gorilla can hit the ball longer and straighter than anybody here at this club. In fact, he hits it 500 yards right down the middle . . . every time!" Everyone in the pro-shop started laughing. After a moment, the newest pro at the...
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| baseball heaven? |
There were two old guys, Abe and Sol, sitting on a bench in a park feeding pigeons and talking about baseball. Just like they did every day. Abe turned to Sol and asked, "Do you think there's baseball in heaven?" Soloman thought about it for a minute and replied, "I dunno, Abe, but let's make a deal: If I die first, I will come back and tell you -- and if you die first, you come back and tell...
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| baseball vs law |
What is the difference between baseball and law?In baseball, if you're caught stealing, you're out.
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| Top 10 - Baseball is better than sex |
TOP 10 REASONS BASEBALL IS BETTER THAN SEX...10. IT IS LEGAL TO PLAY PROFESSIONALLY 9. YOU CAN COUNT ON IT AT LEAST 4 TIMES A WEEK 8. YOU HAVE A COACH TO TELL YOU WHEN TO ADVANCE 7. WHEN YOU ARE TIRED, YOU ALWAYS GET RELIEVED 6. IF YOU STRIKE OUT ONCE, YOU STILL HAVE AT LEAST 2 MORE TIMES TO GET A HIT 5. UP TO 4 PEOPLE CAN SCORE AT ONCE 4. POP UPS ARE FREQUENT 3. 30,000 PEOPLE CHEER WHEN YOU...
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| NCAA ballers to change a lightbulb? |
How many NCAA basketball players does it take to change a light bulb?Only one. But he gets money, a car, and three credit hours for it.
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| Top 10 - Basketball vs Sex |
TOP 10 REASONS BASKETBALL IS BETTER THAN SEX...10. BALL MOVEMENT IS KEY 9. YOU CAN SET IT UP OR GO FOR THE FASTBREAK8. IF YOU NEED A BREAK, YOU CAN CALL A 20 SECOND TIMEOUT 7. THERE IS A COACH TELLING YOU WHEN TO "TAKE IT TO THE HOLE"6. BEING DOUBLE-TEAMED IS COMMON5. YOU CAN PASS IT OFF, SO YOUR BUDDY CAN SCORE 4. IF SCOUTS LIKE YOUR PERFORMANCE, YOU TURN PRO 3. YOU KNOW YOU ARE DONE WHEN THE...
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| Top 10- Hockey vs. Sex |
TOP 10 REASONS HOCKEY IS BETTER THAN SEX...10. YOU GO IN 1-2 MINUTE SHIFTS 9. THE PUCK IS ALWAYS HARD 8. THE PROTECTIVE EQUIPMENT IS REUSABLE 7. IT LASTS A FULL HOUR 6. YOU KNOW YOU ARE FINISHED WHEN THE BUZZER SOUNDS 5. YOUR PARENTS CHEER WHEN YOU SCORE 4. A 2 ON 1 OR 3 ON 1 IS NOT UNCOMMON 3. IT IS LEGAL TO PLAY PROFESSIONALLY 2. YOU CAN COUNT ON IT AT LEAST TWICE A WEEK 1. PERIODS ONLY LAST...
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| Top 10 - Soccer vs. Sex |
TOP 10 REASONS SOCCER IS BETTER THAN SEX...10. BALLS ARE ALWAYS CHECKED FOR FIRMNESS 9. PERIODS ONLY LAST 45 MINUTES8. PARENTS CHEER WHEN YOU SCORE7. SOCCER IS A LEGAL PROFESSION 6. PROTECTIVE EQUIPMENT CAN BE WASHED AND REUSED 5. SIZE DOESN'T MATTER 4. IF YOU GET TOO ROUGH YOU GET A RED CARD 3. YOU CAN SCORE USING YOUR HEAD OR YOUR FEET 2. LASTS A FULL 90 MINUTES1. YOU CAN JUGGLE YOUR BALLS IN...
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