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At Work (118)
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« Viewing jokes  1-10 of 29  |  Next Page »
Funny Jokes
"Mister, why doesn't this cow have any horns?" asked the young lady from a nearby city. The farmer cocked his head for a moment, then began in a patient tone, "Well, ma'am, cattle can do a powerful lot of damage with horns. Sometimes we keep'em trimmed down with a hacksaw. Other times we can fix up the young 'uns by...
Published on Apr. 16, 2011, 8:58 AM by New Vision Development Sherman  | 0 comment(s)
Vampire Bat
A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it. He told them to go away and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in."OK, follow me" he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats...
Published on Jun. 23, 2009, 1:49 PM by maggie@northshoremonuments.com  | 0 comment(s)
Dog named Sex
Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I would like to have one too!" Then I said, "But she is a dog!" He said he didn't care what she looked like. I said, "You don't understand. ... I...
Published on Jun. 23, 2009, 1:49 PM by maggie@northshoremonuments.com  | 0 comment(s)
Ant and Elephant have romance
An ant and an elephant share a night of romance. The next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant is dead. "Shit!" says the ant. "One night of passion and I will spend the rest of my life digging a grave!"
Published on Jun. 23, 2009, 1:49 PM by maggie@northshoremonuments.com  | 0 comment(s)
Difference between a cat and a dog...
A dog thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... They must be Gods! A cat thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... I must be a God!
Published on Jun. 23, 2009, 1:49 PM by maggie@northshoremonuments.com  | 0 comment(s)
rabbits chased by wolf
Two rabbits were being chased by a pack of wolves. The wolves chased the rabbits into a thicket. After a few minutes, one rabbit turned to the other and said, "Well, do you want to make a run for it or stay here a few days and outnumber them?"
Published on Jun. 23, 2009, 1:49 PM by maggie@northshoremonuments.com  | 0 comment(s)
horse
This horse walks in to a bar and asks for a bit to eat!
Published on Jun. 23, 2009, 1:49 PM by maggie@northshoremonuments.com  | 0 comment(s)
bear and a rabbit
A bear is chasing a rabbit through a forest. They find a bottle and decide to rub it. A genie pops out. He says "I will grant each of you three wishes."The bear says "I wish all the bears in the forest were females." *poof* It's done.The rabbit says "I wish for a motorcycle." *poof* It's done.The bear says "I wish all the bears in this country were females." *poof* It's done.The rabbit says "I...
Published on Jun. 23, 2009, 1:49 PM by maggie@northshoremonuments.com  | 0 comment(s)
Do Elephants Ever Forget?
Q: Does an elephant ever forget?A: Only if you loan him money.
Published on Jun. 23, 2009, 1:49 PM by maggie@northshoremonuments.com  | 0 comment(s)
Elephants and Cell-Phones
Q: Why don't elephants use cellular phones?A: So the rest of the world won't know their plans.
Published on Jun. 23, 2009, 1:49 PM by maggie@northshoremonuments.com  | 0 comment(s)
« Viewing jokes  1-10 of 29  |  Next Page »